Warning: This is a not-so-interesting update on our last weekend (January 28, 2007), so folks please have patience.
January 26th is the day when India became a republic. Don’t know if it was the nationalistic fervor in us or was it the feeling of being bored-to-death-on-a-Sunday-evening or was it the hangover of the movie ‘Rang De Basanti’ or the hope of a nice evening or may be all of this put together; we started from the den of loonies in Delhi to salute the India Gate. However, we were late for the Republic Day celebrations by only 38 hours. But folks, what matters the most is the feeling right so we headed for the India gate.
‘We’…hmmm. I say the word and think hard. Wow - a word, so small, can signify so much: the togetherness of a couple, a bunch of loonies in Delhi, a nation, a continent, a planet, a solar system. Such power in something so SMALL. Still not convinced. Wait till the time you see me (wink wink). Anyways, I guess it is the time to come back from my egotrip (ahem). So where were we…
So we, i.e., Motu, Harmu, Tingu, and Tarzan, started from our good old house (with our neighbors wishing us – good riddance and hoping that we won’t return till eternity. We obviously did return to their disappointment) towards bebe’s god-knows-where-place-in-Delhi to pick her up for the sojourn. Curious about our neighbors attitude, imagine living next to two crack-heads with some crazy fetish for loud music irrespective of the time and occasion. I guess you get the idea.
So let us get started on our drive to fun (or so to say)…to India Gate…..We started with the bang, the only difference was that bang had taken a human form as Motu. He was in a mood to rock us and so he did (did not even leave the car, which would dance with everyone of his moves – he weighs just 95). He loves singing, nothing wrong with that. He sings with his heart with utter disregard to the tune, singer, voice modulation, and most importantly other people’s comfort (God how I wish, his girl should listen him sing once, I’m sure she will start having third thoughts about getting married to him. Third Thoughts? Yeah, as I am sure she already is having second thoughts). But he is our friend, so we let him sing (not that he would stop anyways – so as they say, if you are getting raped and can’t do anything about it, enjoy it). Me and Tarzan joined motu in the chorus, just trying to enjoy the rape, and boom goes harmu – “Guys, what kind of dogs you are?” – pat goes Tarzan – “German Shepherds”.
So after enjoying the orgy-cum-more-rape-minus-sex for 40 minutes, we finally got to our destination and waited with clear instructions that nobody comes out of the car.
Bullshitosophy about Girls: The more they want to meet you the more they will make you wait.
Bebe is the epitome of this bullshitosophy of three loonies, her best so far is two and half hours – and believe me she is trying to get better. IST – Indian Stretchable Time, Indians are definitely worse than neggars man!!After waiting for not-willing-to-specify time, the girl hopped in and we were on our way again. We were a happy bunch for couple of seconds and I thought things can only get better now. As soon as the thought came in my head, Bebe started cooing. And damn, realization dawned upon me that she was in the mood to rape as well – rape us all; and Motu suddenly had company. We somehow got to India Gate with very weak ear drums.
In front of India Gate, for some nano-seconds, I felt very nationalistic. The place is absolutely majestic and makes you think. But I was not willing to stay with that feeling for long. At the end of our short stay at Gates, Motu had a lot of fun blowing (literally). Blowing water bubbles is such fun, hmmmmm. What are you folks smiling at, you okay people?
Started again from India gate and got to the expressway and then we took off. Traveling at the speed of 150 KMs per hour (with car’s windows open) and smoking. Wow, folks this is one thing which you all should try. It was crazy, girls screaming their hearts out, and boys laughing/smoking their way to glory. Jesus, it was great. Tarzan, way to go boy, we should try it again. Did I miss the part about alcohol. Bebe was already having an hangover and we guys were having fun with some good beer and wine. Rose took the advice from the Scottish News daily too seriously – Women Warned: Drink Less to Avoid Rape (she should have known better, Motu had the last laugh – patience folks!!)
After landing back, we stopped at a lonely road and then came the best part. Amazing music, thanks to Tarzan, started blaring out of the car’s speakers and we started dancing on the roads under the moonlight. It was absolutely crazy and wonderful. It was amazing fun. We took turns to dance with each other and it was absolutely fun. Even more so for Rose, I guess. Motu was trying some balldancing with her and she was laughing her way to glory. God-knows-what she was laughing at, may be she was feeling a lil girly or may be it was hard for her to fathom the fact that Motu was trying balldance with her. Imagine a Sumo Wrestler trying balldancing with 36-24-36, I guess you get the picture.
Can’t finish before talking about Malaise. Motu - first of all, one of things which this word means is - A vague feeling of discomfort, one that cannot be pinned down but is often sensed as "just not right." Now consider these facts about yourself – you are thinking about buying microwave, dining table, and god-knows-what-else. You go to a departmental store and you appreciate the crockery, curtains, covers, bed-sheets (for Christ-sake man), etc. Now consider this – as a 25 year old guy – I (including Tarzan) generally think about things like alcohol, parties, girls, sex (trying-to-molest-rose does not count as sex), etc, etc. YOU ARE 25 YEARS OLD AS WELL. Now do you get the feeling that something is “just not right” with you (you asked me to be subtle, can’t be more subtle). If yes, then there is still some hope for your; if No, then mate, I already miss my buddy Motu.
At the end – I should also say something about the evening. For a change I will stop being Mean, my dear loonies (including two girls) it was an amazing night, amazing friends (I wish it stays like this forever..stop gasping rose, I can be nice at times…), booze, cigarettes, amazing music, and living every moment like there is no tomorrow. It was just amazing. Troy, miss you mate. Ahem, what’s wrong with me?
That’s All Folks
Tingu
(Reality Keeps Ruining My Life – There is Happiness in Life and Then There is Marriage)
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Payback
There has been so much happening in my life that I have not been able to keep up on my online life. On the other hand, I am sure that Tingu and the new additions (read Tarzan) are encashing every opportunity to spread malaise about me. Thank you guys.
So here it comes straight from the horse's mouth. I have commited the mortal sin of commiting to someone and somehow am not regretting it yet. Yeah, I did travel 7000 miles to get to her - as if India had any shortage of females, yeah 500 million were not enough for me.
Anyway, am I here to bullshit about me? Hell no!! There are some developments that I would like to tell you guys about - Tingu. Did you guys notice some change in his style of writing? He actually jotted something nice about a certain female.. Who the fuck am I kidding? Yeah, our dear friend has been sized up, measured and found wanting.. but then, that's has always been the case, right Tingu? Four feet something would always be found wanting.. but here its a different case altogether.. Bebe - beautiful gal with brains - as Tingu puts it has our lil pest by his balls and everything else too.
Dr. Troy, moving to b'lore certainly did you one good thing, you dont have to put up with Tingu's bullshitology day in and day out. But then, deciphering any kind of information has certainly been one of your weak points rite? I certainly hope that the kicks that you got on new year in mussorie should have pacified your ass for some time - lest it grows out of being kicked. And I'd say, you better make "Dost.. Dost naa raha.." your anthem.
Tarzan, is one hellua colorful person.. No, I'm not talking about his character, its his choice of clothes that make him colorful, lately I've been telling him : you are funny, but then looks aren't everything.
Harmu, well.. earlier introduced as Rose, is the kind of person who'd wrestle a chocolate bar from a kid. So all you aunties out there watch out, she is "adults only" material.
Bebe, a natural addition to our gang, a freak trying to fit into a regular person's shoes, in the process knocking two of our original member's of the three nuts. Now you know, who was knock out and who knocked in?
I guess that enough of malaise, I've already given out enough to get me killed six times over. I'm sure tingu would try and cover it up with a new post.
So here it comes straight from the horse's mouth. I have commited the mortal sin of commiting to someone and somehow am not regretting it yet. Yeah, I did travel 7000 miles to get to her - as if India had any shortage of females, yeah 500 million were not enough for me.
Anyway, am I here to bullshit about me? Hell no!! There are some developments that I would like to tell you guys about - Tingu. Did you guys notice some change in his style of writing? He actually jotted something nice about a certain female.. Who the fuck am I kidding? Yeah, our dear friend has been sized up, measured and found wanting.. but then, that's has always been the case, right Tingu? Four feet something would always be found wanting.. but here its a different case altogether.. Bebe - beautiful gal with brains - as Tingu puts it has our lil pest by his balls and everything else too.
Dr. Troy, moving to b'lore certainly did you one good thing, you dont have to put up with Tingu's bullshitology day in and day out. But then, deciphering any kind of information has certainly been one of your weak points rite? I certainly hope that the kicks that you got on new year in mussorie should have pacified your ass for some time - lest it grows out of being kicked. And I'd say, you better make "Dost.. Dost naa raha.." your anthem.
Tarzan, is one hellua colorful person.. No, I'm not talking about his character, its his choice of clothes that make him colorful, lately I've been telling him : you are funny, but then looks aren't everything.
Harmu, well.. earlier introduced as Rose, is the kind of person who'd wrestle a chocolate bar from a kid. So all you aunties out there watch out, she is "adults only" material.
Bebe, a natural addition to our gang, a freak trying to fit into a regular person's shoes, in the process knocking two of our original member's of the three nuts. Now you know, who was knock out and who knocked in?
I guess that enough of malaise, I've already given out enough to get me killed six times over. I'm sure tingu would try and cover it up with a new post.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
Lesson Learnt: Have a Healthy Disregard for the Impossible
Another one bites the dust. A sad day in the history of MCP clan.
Disregarding Tingu's philosophy about marriage (Tingu's philosophy or rather Bullshitosophy - There is happiness in life and then there is marriage), Motu has finally decided to put his head under the guillotine called 'Marriage'. After a long seven years (I may be wrong about the years, but who cares) of courtship, Motu has tested positive for the disease called marriage. His life is over now, if I may add with some masochistic pleasure (c'mon folks it hurts). The symptoms of the disease in Motu have started to show up very often now, such as: plans to buy microwave, dining table, etc. Who on earth talks like that man. If marriage wasn't scary enough for me, it has become even scarier as I am watching my friend suffer from it. God bless him. Two minutes of silence in the rememberance of the 'Cool Boy Jay'.
Anyways, it has been long and you guys deserve an update on our lives. This is an update starting January 1, 2007. Now the question is that 'What happened before that?'. So my question to you folks is that are you guys really interested, if yes, then let us know. We will think about writing some stuff in next ten years. We love you all.
Motu:
Do I need to say more about him? He went to the love of his life (only 7000 miles from India and 20 degrees colder place) to meet the death of his bachelorhood (for christsake man, was he nuts? They are right when they say that 'Love is Blind'. I personally think it is deaf, dumb, and retarded as well.) and came back with the engagement ring. Engagement ring, doesn't the ring of it sound scary? Sounds like the equivalent of SUFFERring (agreed. I picked it up from somwhere. Don't start screaming folks.). Apart from that small bachlors-life-ending incident, life has been rocking for him. Tons of beer, dance, smoke; we get into the details a lil later.
Tingu:
Life has been a mixed bag for our little pest. He has gone through the horrible experience of being a part of two marriage and has religiously prayed for the peace of the two dead men. For the new year, it was amazing and awsome mountains in India. All in all, things have not been bad. I am sure you folks will get some comments about it from Motu. (By the way I am publishing this blog in his absence so that I can avoid his editing bit.)
DR. Troy:
Life has been a teacher for DR. Troy. He has been taught the most critical lesson for his life as described below:
Bullshitosophy of Life: Life can be beautiful without friends. Their company may not always do you good. I have to confess that myself and Motu have done our best to teach him this.
So as you guys may have gathered that we are taking good care of our friend DR. Troy. Our friend has understood the essence of this lesson and has moved out of Delhi with us wishing him Good Luck and Good Riddance.
Time to introduce some more characters in the dramatic lives of 'Three Nuts in Delhi'.
Harmu: A very beautiful girl who is the apt epitome of this fact about girls.
Bullshitosophy about Girls: The beauty and brains are inveresely proportional to each other in Girls. Girls if you understood the meaning of 'inversely proporotional' then congratulations you are safe from Mankind (no one wud ever bother you) and if you did not then my number is +91 9999 2298 34. I love dumb females.
Bebe (or baby): A very beautiful girl again but with some signs of brains (Harmu: stop screaming. There are exceptions to all the rules.) and bebe don't be elated by no comments on you. Your time shall come as well.
Tarzan: Again, the name says it all. Wild at heart and otherwise as well. DOn't believe me, then wait till the time I post his dancing videos.
We will give you updates on our new characters regularly. There is a lot to talk about otherwise as well.
So may God bless all.
Tingu
(Reality keeps ruining my life)
P.S. Bullshitosophy: Motu, seeking revenge is sinful. Don't you ever do that.
Disregarding Tingu's philosophy about marriage (Tingu's philosophy or rather Bullshitosophy - There is happiness in life and then there is marriage), Motu has finally decided to put his head under the guillotine called 'Marriage'. After a long seven years (I may be wrong about the years, but who cares) of courtship, Motu has tested positive for the disease called marriage. His life is over now, if I may add with some masochistic pleasure (c'mon folks it hurts). The symptoms of the disease in Motu have started to show up very often now, such as: plans to buy microwave, dining table, etc. Who on earth talks like that man. If marriage wasn't scary enough for me, it has become even scarier as I am watching my friend suffer from it. God bless him. Two minutes of silence in the rememberance of the 'Cool Boy Jay'.
Anyways, it has been long and you guys deserve an update on our lives. This is an update starting January 1, 2007. Now the question is that 'What happened before that?'. So my question to you folks is that are you guys really interested, if yes, then let us know. We will think about writing some stuff in next ten years. We love you all.
Motu:
Do I need to say more about him? He went to the love of his life (only 7000 miles from India and 20 degrees colder place) to meet the death of his bachelorhood (for christsake man, was he nuts? They are right when they say that 'Love is Blind'. I personally think it is deaf, dumb, and retarded as well.) and came back with the engagement ring. Engagement ring, doesn't the ring of it sound scary? Sounds like the equivalent of SUFFERring (agreed. I picked it up from somwhere. Don't start screaming folks.). Apart from that small bachlors-life-ending incident, life has been rocking for him. Tons of beer, dance, smoke; we get into the details a lil later.
Tingu:
Life has been a mixed bag for our little pest. He has gone through the horrible experience of being a part of two marriage and has religiously prayed for the peace of the two dead men. For the new year, it was amazing and awsome mountains in India. All in all, things have not been bad. I am sure you folks will get some comments about it from Motu. (By the way I am publishing this blog in his absence so that I can avoid his editing bit.)
DR. Troy:
Life has been a teacher for DR. Troy. He has been taught the most critical lesson for his life as described below:
Bullshitosophy of Life: Life can be beautiful without friends. Their company may not always do you good. I have to confess that myself and Motu have done our best to teach him this.
So as you guys may have gathered that we are taking good care of our friend DR. Troy. Our friend has understood the essence of this lesson and has moved out of Delhi with us wishing him Good Luck and Good Riddance.
Time to introduce some more characters in the dramatic lives of 'Three Nuts in Delhi'.
Harmu: A very beautiful girl who is the apt epitome of this fact about girls.
Bullshitosophy about Girls: The beauty and brains are inveresely proportional to each other in Girls. Girls if you understood the meaning of 'inversely proporotional' then congratulations you are safe from Mankind (no one wud ever bother you) and if you did not then my number is +91 9999 2298 34. I love dumb females.
Bebe (or baby): A very beautiful girl again but with some signs of brains (Harmu: stop screaming. There are exceptions to all the rules.) and bebe don't be elated by no comments on you. Your time shall come as well.
Tarzan: Again, the name says it all. Wild at heart and otherwise as well. DOn't believe me, then wait till the time I post his dancing videos.
We will give you updates on our new characters regularly. There is a lot to talk about otherwise as well.
So may God bless all.
Tingu
(Reality keeps ruining my life)
P.S. Bullshitosophy: Motu, seeking revenge is sinful. Don't you ever do that.
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